How has SM/ACM affected your sex life ?

[razzle51]

How has SM/ACM affected your sex life ?

[petsmom]

Ah, that is a distant memory. SEX?? One of the last times was a nghtmare for me. Same lover! Always been better than in the movies type of lovemaking. But felt like he suddenly gained 100lbs. and I was being crammed clear thru the mattress. My spine was killing me, could not breathe and just wanted him to get off me NOW. I couldn;t understand what had just happened nor did he. My back hurt for days as if it were broken. Other embarrassing things started happening while in the process. Lost proper sensations!!?? It all changed for me.

Finding the syrinx midspine kinda explained a lot of it. Been celibant for years now. Why bother??

[ariesdiva1116]

Okay since this is a question about sex I believe I can be open to this. My DH is average size for **. I cant really feel his ** when it is inside me. I have thought that maybe having someone who has a larger ** I would feel it bettter. I am not a cheat so therefore I dont know if it would be true. The only way in which I am able to have an orgams is with masturbation. Sex is painful. There is pain in my back and in my vagina. I dont feel a sense of "good" within my vagina. Because of the pain I dry up very quicly therefore making it more painful. Lack of sex is causing a major problem in my marriage. DH feels unloved and less of a "man". Sex is very seldom for us. My DH is a very sexual person and I worry that he may decide to cheat since he isn't being fulfilled at home. The only way I feel anything is with my clitoris, hence the reason of masturbation. Not sure if anyone else goes through this

[streetsense]

My issue is not so much with how SM has affected my sex life, but the treatment has. When using cannabis to treat myself before my SM was formally diagnosed, as I did for 15 years, I can't say that I had any problems other than those having to do with my bad disc at T7-8.

Now that cannabis is forbidden under my recent circumstances and I'm being treated with hydrocodone and a greatly increased dosage of amitriptyline, these really have cut into my "interest" in terms of sex. Fortunately my dear GF is understanding.

That's just one more reason why cannabis should be available to treat SM.

[mystarwn]

When I have a partner, I now realize that my SM and ankylosing spondylitis helps lock me up and spasm in my adductor muscles. It also causes numbness at times... other times, sex is just wonderful... but when things are kinked up... lord, it's numb to painful!

[CMS]

i feel bad, specially since i am 25, but we have it like MAYBE 1 time a month, and i dont enjoy anything, i was only diagnosed, but i know i have had the symptoms for a long time. I do it more for him. I do love him. but i feel like crud all the time.

[mindriot]

the SM seems to be slowly affecting my sex life more & more. i am still as active as possible, we're 29 and getting married next year, but... i usually need a day or two to recover anymore from the back pain and muscle soreness/weakness. immediately afterwards, i am always very twitchy and feel like my skin is crawling. that never used to happen, has been a new one in the past 4 months.

[Icequeen32]

Always pain these days...well when i feel i can handle it. obgyn me to psych! All in my head...
Not saying pleasure wasnt involved. But this past yr, we end up stopping, or I crying afterwards.
hmm...maybe thats the reason our relationship went south!!!

[tlserenity]

OK - When i got on here this morning I did a search on 'sex'. I must admit i am releived to find this in the poll section.

I think i have gone numb down there. and from what i am reading - i am not the only one?
after not having 'any' since before my decompression I finally 'gave in' this morning and i couldn't feel anything inside.
it was a very strange feeling.

Now since then - the headaches and all have been much sharper than yesterday - is this caused from having sex?
My husband is upset and thinks now that he has made me hurt worse.
I totally lied to him and told him i am sure that isn't the case.

[amber4949]

Razzle, I'm so glad you posted this because I had been wanting to ask about it too. I picked painful as my choice, though it's not totally accurate because I'd say it's painful about 95% of the time. And it's hard to find that 5% when I'll be able to enjoy it. My main problems are not being able to get comfortable with my head and neck and that I usually get a really bad headache afterwards. And also, often when I get aroused, that alone can cause a headache. It is really annoying because I love my boyfriend and although he's good about it, I know it drives him nuts and I can totally understand. I'm hoping that it gets better after my decompression surgery which I'm having in 9 days. Has anyone noticed changes after the surgery?

[amber4949]

Just thought I'd check and see if anyone does have any input on potential improvements after the PFD. It's been 4 months now and it seems like I should be pretty good by now but simply getting aroused can make me get sharp pains in my head. It's so hard since I absolutely love my boyfriend and before things got bad, sex with him was better than it had ever been in my life. So to go from that to being scared to have sex because of the pain has really sucked.

[Chiariblogger]

Was having this conversation with a female sufferer the other day and came to some amazing conclusions that my NS has never even mentioned.

I thought that ACM / SM only affected guys in that depleted sensation and inability to remain aroused on top of the continual pain, chronic fatigue etc tends to spoil the general flow of all things sex? It's not difficult for me to get aroused, but it is near impossible for me to remain in that state

It seems that it does affect the ladies too with loss of sensation and all of the above............ I guess nerve damage has a lot to answer for

I was thinking at one point that it was more psychological than anything, but when there is a loss of sensation, then it must be physical too?

Great subject and one that I have only realised recently might have a direct link with ACM and SM.......... Thank you to the above who have been very kind as to add to the topic.

More power to you all.

Many Thanks

Chris

[luv2bowljen]

I answered still good, because while it is occuring, it is still that.

However, I cannot walk afterwards. I have to wait at least 1/2 hour before I can even get out of bed. And today, I have a severe HA.

I thought it was just me

Thank you for a great post...I hope that I continue to only have issues walking afterward with the post-coital HA...I can live with that after a great love session.

[karenb]

What sex life? I didn't have one before I got SM, and nothing's changed.

Karen

[chrisw]

Time for a SM/CM dating site?